I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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