I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
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i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
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Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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