i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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