I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
