Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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