I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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