lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am naked and annoyed.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize