Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
