I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
