ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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