Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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