Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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