Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize