Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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