somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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