happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
