I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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