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• (301): View more from Maryland

  She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.

  (1-870): View more from Arkansas

  You always know what to say to make me feel better.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Order is debatable

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• (650): View more from California

  Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?

  Fav 8 1131 876

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  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (818): View more from California

  end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.

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