i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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