Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
40s are totally the cure
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
