I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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