I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
