Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
