i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize