So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
