i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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