he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
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