Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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