i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
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was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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