You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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