this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
