covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
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