Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
