i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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