I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
