I think scott just propositioned me for sex
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
