You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize