He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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