Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
It's official drugs can't kill me
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize