Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
