Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
