proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
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