is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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