Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
