Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
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