She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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