Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
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