I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I'm like, not good at living.