That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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