Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Randomize
